January 16, 2005
MarkBernstein.org
 

Colorful Writing

The folks at the paint factory are good with color, and if you need a hand with adjectives someday, I bet they'd be happy to help.

One wall of our kitchen stairs is painted in interactive cream. You aren't supposed to click the wall. It's just a name. Lots of interactive entertainment is like that, such as those heavily-promoted sports sites where they spend hundreds of thousands of dollars to ask you to choose your favorite quarterback. I wondered why anyone wants to know this, but then realized that no one does and I felt much better.

The interactive cream stairway leads to a hall that is interactive cream on the side you can't interact with, that side being mostly out of reach. The other walls are painted in bagel. My first impression was, "this bagel is very pale; the full name of the paint must be goyische bagel, but they doubtless shortened it to save ink." But, actually, after comparing the wall to a Zeppy's bagel, I'd have to admit the wall is a pretty fair match. Except that the wall has no poppy seeds.

The doors in the hall were going to be maple sugar. The combination seemed good in theory, but it turns out upon further review that maple sugar doesn't go particularly well with the bagel and the cream. We should have foreseen the difficulty, but we didn't trust the metaphor. So belay the maple sugar; we're going to try mannered gold instead. Manners and mannerism are nice, too, and have fewer calories than maple sugar.

We're hoping that merlot won't clash with railroad. Come to think about it, this weblog is painted in railroad and merlot, so that should be harmonious -- at any rate, the clash should be familiar. The wood trim is all painted in a color I'd have called "white", but the paint factory calls linger. Doubtless that day's batch of adjectives had dried out when they made up the formula and they had to make do with a verb in a pinch.

I hope to linger in the kitchen myself someday; hot plates are getting old.